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Submitted on
December 23, 2012
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We are all connected.
We share one light,
But we all share one darkness.
However,
Darkness is nothing to fear,
For without it,
There can be no light.
We would be lost,
With no place to call home.
You should not fear the darkness,
And instead accept it.
Even though it may scare us,
It is nature's way of rebirth.
But we must be aware of it,
For if left unchecked
Our light will vanish.
Nevertheless,
No matter how far apart we are,
Just remember this one thing,
As long as you have faith,
Our hearts will always find each other.
God dammit, why am I up so late? Oh yeah, I slept in 'til 1 pm and can't fall asleep :facepalm:

Well, I felt the urge to write a poem after watching the cutscenes of Kingdom Hearts: Birth By Sleep. The ending is always so emotional, I near to cry every time. I'm so excited about the final KH game, but I'm real worried that I won't have the gaming system for it :( Hopefully it will be the PS3 of 3DS^^

I do not own Kingdom Hearts, for which this poem is based off of.
:iconvanitasrocks:
Great job! I think you've definitely got a great topic for this poem! The idea of light and darkness having to balance each other I think captures the essence of Kingdom Hearts. Overall, I think your technique is good when it comes to getting your ideas and emotions across. Unfortunately, I think the piece lacks a smooth flow to be perfectly honest. Specifically, you have two lines that are dedicated to just "however" and "nevertheless." I don't think you need either of these lines because I think your meaning is conveyed in the lines surrounding them. I also think it would benefit from maybe a bit of enjambment now and then to help blend the lines together, so that a reader is pulled deeper into your writing. As a quick example in line six you have "For without it,/there can be no light" I'd say just cut the comma and let your reader move into the next line. I guess though if you wanted a very short lined piece that had a very clipped rhythm then you're fine! Regardless, it was still a good piece!
What do you think?
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